dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
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