The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
