some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
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