Apparently you make a good broom.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
mondays should just be called national damage control day
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize