i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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