The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Randomize
