I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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