so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
Randomize
