I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Randomize
