if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
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