Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
