The maid of honor just puked.
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize