were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
Randomize
