i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
We had to coat check the pizza.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Randomize
