I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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