Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
