Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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