sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Randomize