last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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