talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
