Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Randomize
