Please don't use social media to get back at me.
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
Bring me that man meat
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
