school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
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