I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
Randomize
