Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
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