Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize
