I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
Randomize
