how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
