you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
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