Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
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