This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Randomize