He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
Randomize