: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize
