your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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