Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize
