why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
