Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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