he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
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