can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Randomize
