i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
Randomize
