i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize