Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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