dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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