K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Randomize
