Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
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