You made me cry and you don't even care
I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
Randomize
