I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
Why is your signature on my underwear?
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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