Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
Randomize
