Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
