Just cropdusted the office
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Randomize
