So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
Randomize
