I hate all girls vehemently.
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Randomize
