If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Randomize